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Band 7

Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. films stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #entertainers #e #g #films #stars #pop #musicians #sports #money
Working as a professional isn't always easy, which requires time and endless efforts to improve the skills.
Although
 many famous
entertainers
 earned well,
that is
 known to be the most difficult job in the world. Do they deserve to earn more fees than other professions? I will talk about that in
this
 essay.
First
 of all,
entertainers
 are one of the most stressful jobs as per past research papers and reports.
Moreover
, there's
also
 a high suicide rate in the entertainment
industry
 compared to others. When they started in a junior role in the
industry
, they have to try extremely hard to fit into the role and gain fame. Many
talents
 are required to showcase in
this
industry
,
for example
, communication, styling, and acting. Before they retired from
this
industry
, their public appearance is restricted by their agencies or companies. If they don't show their
talents
 well in many shows, their earnings are
also
 limited until they are famous. Not all of them got famous by trying so hard and appearing in many different shows.
Therefore
, their pay is different based on many of those factors how well they are doing as well as their maturity in the entertainment world. I agree with getting their pay well.
On the other hand
, some people might
also
 think that some young
entertainers
 are earning extremely well despite their age. Not only some young ones are lucky to have fame quickly but
also
 they are signed by good agencies. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they might have a better chance than others overall, they still showcase their
talents
 in many forms. Because of some small percentage of success at a young age,
entertainers
 still need to show their great
talents
. Sometimes those may not be the real truth as some
entertainers
 are earning very low despite long working hours and stressful life daily. In conclusion, many talented professionals deserve to earn well based on their skills and achievements. The artists are working hard daily to give great joy, learning and relaxation to audiences like us today. I believe that they should be earning well for showing their professionalism all the time.
Submitted by tthtoonmm on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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