Today, the majority of children are raised by their grandparents since their parents are busy working. To what extent do you think it affects the whole family?

Nowadays, people are busy and they do not have time to take care of their
children
as much as they would like to.
That is
the reason why they send their kids to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
daycare or they allow their
parents
to take care of them. Those actions have an impact on
children
's development and family relations. I would like to present my point of view below.
Firstly
,
grandparents
are playing a significant part in
children
's lives but they are not their
parents
,
therefore
, they are unable to replace them. Kids need their
parents
and regardless of
age
Add a comma
,age
show examples
they are aware of their absence. They can get aggressive, their behaviour might get worse. In order to change the way
children
act,
grandparents
often give them what they want, there is no discipline.
As a result
,
children
behave the same way at home with their
parents
as they do with
grandparents
Correct pronoun usage
their grandparents
show examples
.
For example
, it leads to significant problems in
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
development, which can affect their future.
Furthermore
, it can lead to arguments among family members. They might blame each other for the child's issues.
However
, raising kids by
grandparents
is better than leaving them in a nursery or kindergarten. They are among family, not strangers. They spend their time in a familiar environment, where they feel safe.
Consequently
, it can improve relations between family members, given, that
parents
can be grateful for help and
grandparents
for an opportunity to spend more time with their grandchildren.
For instance
, bonds between them might be tightened as they have the same purpose, to raise a beloved heir. To conclude, personally I believe that parent should raise their
children
but
grandparents
can provide a huge help in
this
process, as long as, they know how to take care of
children
properly because some mistakes may spoil
children
and impact their future.
Submitted by paulastb6 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: