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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

#believe #action #crime
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All over the world, every society has to deal with criminal elements that wreak havoc. It is the belief of a certain group of people that criminology is being curbed adequately,
however
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, others opine that additional things need to be done to handle the menace. While both sides of the divide are resolute in their stance, I concur that measures to curtail wrongdoing need to increase.
To begin
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, a few people insist that the existing rules act as an adequate deterrent. They believe that the law provides severe enough repercussions for bad acts that will dissuade other would-be criminals.
For example
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,
last
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 year in Soho, the burglary rate was reduced by half after a 15-year-old was sentenced to a 3-year jail term for breaking and entering a neighbour's house.
Conversely
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, not all communities are so lucky as it is seen that a greater number of individuals are forced into vices. In societies where the average income is low, there has been a spike in atrocities committed by the less privileged. An illustration of
this
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 is Okigwe municipality, where there was heavy looting of the neighbourhood department store a few weeks after the city factory shut down and half the town lost their jobs. The result was an outcry from the store owners for more policemen to be sent to their town for increased protection. In conclusion, while the crime rate is on the rise, not everyone believes that the aftereffects to those to commit them
to
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apply
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need to be more intense as the current measures discourage more evildoers.
Nevertheless
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, I agree that affixing more difficult punishments to criminals is necessary because the increasing loss of jobs in societies causes more and more people to tend to crimes to be able to fend for themselves.
Submitted by oto.victoriauna on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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