IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case ? Do you think this a positive or negative situation ?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Being
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Add an article
the home
a home
show examples
home owner
Correct your spelling
homeowner
show examples
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
plays
vital
Add an article
a vital
show examples
 role in
this
Linking Words
 contemporary Era. There for the reason in few Nations folk gives much Momentous to owning a home rather than renting
one
Use synonyms
.There are plethora
reasons
Change preposition
of reasons
show examples
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
such
Linking Words
 a situation. And I strongly believe
that is
Linking Words
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
 development. So both aspects will be discussed in the
ensuring
Correct your spelling
ensuing
show examples
 paragraphs. To commence with ; discussing the reasons, the
first
Linking Words
 and foremost reason is that if a
person
Use synonyms
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 own
house
Use synonyms
 so it can not only gives peace but
also
Linking Words
 immense joy.
This
Linking Words
 is because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
person
Use synonyms
 can
renovated
Change the verb form
renovate
show examples
 their Abode by his choice.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
one
Use synonyms
 problem
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can
be destroy
Change the verb form
be destroyed
show examples
Linking Words
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
times we have been observing that after
one
Use synonyms
 year period of time,when
Agreement
Correct article usage
the Agreement
show examples
finish
Add a missing verb
is finish
show examples
, so they have to transfer all household items from
one
Use synonyms
 end to
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other end
Change the wording
another end
other ends
show examples
 of
area
Add an article
the area
show examples
. Apart from that,
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 reason is that in many culture plethora
person
Use synonyms
 believe that a
person
Use synonyms
 who pay
amount
Correct article usage
a amount
show examples
 of money in renting. So, it indicates that they are not
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
wealthy. For instance, in India parents visit the
house
Use synonyms
 for looking probable match for their daughter's marriage and mostly they do not prefer who has been paying rent.
Thus
Linking Words
,
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of people try to own
Use synonyms
house
Correct article usage
a house
show examples
instead
Linking Words
 of renting
one
Use synonyms
. Moving ahead, I consider
that is
Linking Words
 a definitely beneficial development because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it is
one
Use synonyms
 type of investment for the future. Which will be helpful not only nasty time but
also
Linking Words
 in retirement life.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 a
person
Use synonyms
 who
buying
Change the form of the verb
bought
show examples
 a
house
Use synonyms
 in
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
20
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
his
Change the word
a
show examples
 younger age and after 30 years
these same abode
Change the determiner
this same abode
these same abodes
show examples
 he would sell so he will get almost
two fold
Add a hyphen
two-fold
show examples
 amount of money.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 approach is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
beneficial in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
long-term
Correct your spelling
long term
show examples
. To conclude, it can be said that
although
Linking Words
 when the
person
Use synonyms
Change the verb form
tries
show examples
try
Change the form of the verb
trying
show examples
 to become
owner
Add an article
the owner
an owner
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
house
Add an article
the house
show examples
, it might
be struggled
Change to the active voice
struggle
have struggled
show examples
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
that will be helped in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 future as
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 investment. So
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 as well as the family
living
Wrong verb form
live
show examples
 better life in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
retirement.
Submitted by meetjsoni23 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
What to do next:
Look at other essays: