In order to reduce crime, we need to attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. It is enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Crime

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is a worldwide phenomenon which is on an exponential rise. Many believe that in order to decrease the rates of

crime

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, we must address the issues

such

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as poverty and lack of educational opportunities as placing more police force and imprisonment is not enough to deter them. I agree and believe that the driving forces behind these crimes are because of an uneducated society as well as the surges in inflation.

Firstly

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, some may believe that lack of education limits the borders of intelligence.

For example

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in many cities where the education rate is below average, those cities have a higher

crime

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rate.

This

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means that many

people

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may be unaware of or underestimate the consequences of committing crimes

such

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as theft or burglary or even as paramount as murder.

Similarly

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, education is

additionally

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needed for individuals to aspire to career goals.

As a result

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this

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keeps them busy studying and off the streets.

Therefore

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educating

people

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about the consequences and encouraging them to study can inspire society to stay off the streets and refrain from committing any

crime

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Secondly

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, our surging inflation makes it very difficult to survive on a basic salary. For ,example many families across the UK are paid basic wages.

Moreover

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, some households only have one breadwinner .

As a result

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, it has become extremely difficult to provide even the basic necessities

consequently

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, resulting in thefts and burglaries.

Hence

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, it is absolutely paramount that we try and help alleviate reasons for poverty to deter

people

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from committing

such

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crimes. In conclusion, to enable us to decrease

crime

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rates, we must help share the burden of the community by guiding the poor and strengthening our educational abilities, as only increasing the police force and putting

people

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into jails won’t stop them.

tibsrTue Nov 08 2022

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12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

root causes of crime
criminal behavior
legitimate economic opportunities
enhancing educational opportunities
skills and qualifications
job prospects
economic disparities
social programs
economic empowerment
police presence
deter criminal activities
underlying issues
prison sentences
rehabilitate criminals
comprehensive rehabilitation programs
community-building efforts
social services
supportive environment
discourages criminal behavior

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In order to reduce crime, we need to attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. It is enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Young people who commit crimes should be treated the same way as adults. To what extent do agree or disagree?

It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30, as this is the best for the individual and for society. Do you agree or disagree?

Some companies sponsor sports and sports stars as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in childhood obesity, while others think it is the fault of the parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Ambition is a positive quality for people to have in society today. How important is it for people who want to succeed in life? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?