Violence in playgrounds is increasing. However, it is important that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

These days, the rate of violent behaviour among teenagers has been increasing in playgrounds and schools. Some people believe that
parents
should encourage their
children
to fight back when they are bullied, I agree with
this
to some extent . Fighting back can have some advantages for
children
. In
this
way, they will learn how to defend themselves ,and
this
boosts their self-esteem.
For example
, some students who speak with a stammer may be mocked by some of their classmates. In
this
case, it is important that
parents
teach their
children
how to stand up for themselves because if they bear
this
misbehaviour,
this
circumstance will continue. It is likely that they lose their confidence ,and feel depressed after a
while
.
Thus
, their academic performance may decrease.
Nevertheless
, hitting back causes some negative impacts.
In other words
,
children
who are bullied may turn to behave aggressively with other people.
For instance
, if they are taught by their
parents
to fight back, they may treat their siblings the same way at home.
As a result
, bullying can be common among adolescents.
In addition
, by fighting back, it is probable that some students are injured physically. It is important that
parents
encourage
children
to try to discuss or even call their teachers and the police in order to defend themselves.
To sum up
, it seems to me that
although
fighting back can raise
children
’s self-esteem, it is more useful that
children
are encouraged not to fight back and try to discuss with their classmates or ask teachers or police to help them.
Submitted by atoosa_1398 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each body paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting details that relate directly to the topic.
task achievement
Make sure to fully address both aspects of the topic and express a clear opinion in the introduction and conclusion.

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