IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#governments #money #railways #roads
Despite it being a controversial issue that where more budget should spend on railways or roads by the governments?
However
, I completely agree that
trains
 should be prioritized above all kinds of communication
medium
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mediums
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.
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On
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One
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On
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 the one hand, the most significant advantages of railways are secured journey and cost
convenient
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convenience
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. When
people
 want to move anywhere along with their families, most of the time they
aware
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are aware
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about
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of
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 the safe journey.
For example
, recently a report has been published on
‘annual
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the ‘annual
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 accident ratio’ in the daily newspaper that only two
percent
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per cent
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of accident
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accident
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accidents
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 occurred by
trains
, while 98% of the accident
Correct your spelling
happened
happend
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happened
 on the roads in the
last
 three years in Bangladesh.
In addition
,
this
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these
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 vehicles are very
Add a hyphen
cost-effective
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cost effective
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cost-effective
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 in comparison to other vehicles, and all kinds of
people
 can afford these easily
from
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apply
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lower
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the lower
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 class to
upper
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the upper
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 class.
For instance
, some
companies
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company
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 owners shared in an interview that they loved to use
metro
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the metro
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 for avoiding traffic
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congestion
congession
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congestion
 in Chennai.
Consequently
,
government
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the government
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 should be concerned more
in
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with
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 the rail sector than others.
On the other hand
, travel by
trains
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train
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 might be played an important role
to
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in
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 reducing carbon
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emission
emissions
emmision
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emissions
 and saving
times
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time
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. While
trains
 will be available to commute to every
destinations
Change to a singular noun
destination
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 throughout the cities and countries, car users would be reduced drastically. To illustrate, a study has shown in the
last
 year that 76% of air has been polluted
Correct your spelling
through
thorugh
Correct your spelling
through
 car fumes in China. Even worse, children and old
people
 are suffering from breathing problems severely.
Moreover
, time is
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
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thought the most crucial part
in
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of
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the
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apply
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modern life, and
people
 could be
benifical
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beneficial
 if they use a
high speed
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high-speed
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 train rather than busses. In conclusion,
although
 road networks have many positive aspects undoubtedly, I believe that spend on the rails could be the best solution for the governments
in
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from
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 all perspectives.
Submitted by ataul.mumit on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
What to do next:
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