IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

It is becoming popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

#year #school #university
Nowadays school graduates have
opportunity
Correct article usage
the opportunity
show examples
 to have a
year
 off before entering
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
university. It is considered that
gap
Correct article usage
a gap
show examples
year
 between graduation and entering
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
show examples
 is more often
practiced
Change the spelling
practised
show examples
 and preferred by many juveniles. The aim of
this
 essay is to examine
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 and drawbacks of having
gap
Add an article
a gap
show examples
year
. On the one hand,
gap
Correct article usage
a gap
show examples
year
 provides the possibility to earn money for needs and wants, whereas people could not have a chance to full-time work while studying at university.
In other words
, having work experience throughout the
year
 off is convenient due to the given free time.
For instance
, everyone needs money for housing and subsistence which are not affordable for some individuals after
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
graduating.
Therefore
gap
year
 is
appropriate
Correct article usage
an appropriate
show examples
 period for money-making before studying.
On the other hand
,
gap
Add an article
a gap
show examples
year
 may cause
Add an article
a feeling
the feeling
show examples
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
 of being behind
individual’s
Correct article usage
an individual’s
show examples
 peers. Particularly, in some
cases
Add a comma
,cases
show examples
gap
year
 practitioners think
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that their peers are a
year
 ahead
them
Change preposition
of them
show examples
 and
feeling
Wrong verb form
feel
show examples
 anxious about it.
For example
,
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
 can be the older
freshmen
Fix the agreement mistake
freshman
show examples
 in class, thereby being unconfident. These factors may be
struggling
Replace the word
struggle
show examples
 and
distract
Replace the word
distraction
show examples
 from studying
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is disadvantageous. In conclusion,
although
 the
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
gap
year
 can be
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 psychological issues, it is beneficial to save money for the future. As discussed in
this
 essay, graduates must weigh the pros and cons already and decide what would be relevant for them.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • work experience
  • internships
  • traveling
  • life experiences
  • personal development
  • independent
  • self-reliant
  • educational progress
  • graduation timeline
  • financial burden
  • academic momentum
  • structured academic environment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: