Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cell phone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Due to technological advancement, monitoring system appears to be very common nowadays, ranging from
cell
phone
tracking to
security
cameras. Some people raise the privacy concern that we are always being monitored without knowing it. While there are some drawbacks to using monitoring
systems
, I believe that the pros of using these
systems
outweigh the cons. The major criticism of these
security
systems
is that they invade others’ privacy.
This
is because our movements are being tracked all the time. Not only do they make some people feel uncomfortable, but
also
they harm personal freedom. It will
also
be uneasy and even insecure for
cell
phone
tracking.
For example
, my friend once told me that she sometimes felt distressed as her whole family know her activities with
cell
phone
tracking apps that all of them agree to install for
security
.
However
, it seems that monitoring system brings more benefit to different groups of people.
First
, the number of crimes
such
as stealing can be reduced with CCTV in stores and shopping malls.
Second
, it would be useful to get evidence from
security
cameras in schools and
cell
phone
tracking apps if children are in danger.
This
also
applies to the elderly with dementia as
cell
phone
tracking allows families to find their loved ones easier in case of disconnection. To conclude,
although
monitoring
systems
have several problems, it is still believed that the advantages created outweigh the disadvantages if the
systems
are used in the proper ways.
Submitted by cindywanhl on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Surveillance
  • 2. Monitoring
  • 3. Cell phone tracking
  • 4. Security cameras
  • 5. Public safety
  • 6. Law enforcement
  • 7. Privacy concerns
  • 8. Personal freedom
  • 9. Autonomous
  • 10. Breach of trust
  • 11. Misuse of information
  • 12. Institutional integrity
  • 13. Psychological impact
  • 14. Mental well-being
  • 15. Societal trust
  • 16. Paranoia
  • 17. Transparency
  • 18. Stringent regulations
  • 19. Criminal deterrence
  • 20. Apprehension of criminals
What to do next:
Look at other essays: