IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Without capital punishment (the death penalty), our lives are less secure, and crimes of violence increase. Capital punishment is essential to control violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#punishment #death #penalty #lives #crimes #violence #control #society
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is said that returning
violence
Use synonyms
 with
violence
Use synonyms
 will multiply it. Many people,
however
Linking Words
, believe that without capital
punishment
Use synonyms
crimes
Use synonyms
 would increase, and they wouldn’t have
safety
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. It is
also
Linking Words
 argued that
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
penalty
Use synonyms
 is vital for curbing the
crime
Use synonyms
 rates in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. In my opinion,
nonetheless
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is a controversial issue, and as there can be various other ways to rein the
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
 of
crimes
Use synonyms
 and
violence
Use synonyms
,
instead
Linking Words
 of capital
punishment
Use synonyms
, I tend to disagree with it.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, from my perspective, it is
inhuman
Correct your spelling
inhumane
show examples
 to implement capital
punishment
Use synonyms
 in a civilized
society
Use synonyms
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, many consider offenders as worthless worms in a righteous
society
Use synonyms
 that must be eliminated to enhance
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
safety
Use synonyms
, and the offenders are not given a
second
Linking Words
 chance to prove they are capable of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
change. According to the results of a recently done research, countries that implement
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
penalty
Use synonyms
 have a higher
rate
Use synonyms
 of
crimes
Use synonyms
 and
violence
Use synonyms
 compared with the countries with less severe methods of
punishment
Use synonyms
. Another point to consider is the power of education and
prevention
Correct article usage
the prevention
show examples
 of
crimes
Use synonyms
. It is stated that if juvenile criminals are educated properly and if the government tackles the pressing economic issues immediately,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
crime
Use synonyms
 would be curbed. As an example, Norway is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 country with the lowest
rate
Use synonyms
 of
crime
Use synonyms
 and
violence
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 country,
although
Linking Words
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
penalty
Use synonyms
 is abolished, the government has provided proper
counseling
Change the spelling
counselling
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and has given the citizens economic freedom.
Moreover
Linking Words
, another vital factor in
this
Linking Words
 country’s success in combating
crime
Use synonyms
 is addressing the pressing issues to the point, which has brought
immense
Add an article
an immense
show examples
 amount of
safety
Use synonyms
 and security
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, from my perspective,
although
Linking Words
 many argue that
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
penalty
Use synonyms
 will control the
crime
Use synonyms
 and
violence
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
, and it should be implemented to maintain
safety
Use synonyms
 and security in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
, other efficient ways can be used to control
crime
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as educating and
counseling
Change the spelling
counselling
show examples
 to curb the
crime
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by salehi81 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: