Society is becoming obsessed with material goods like fast cars,designer clothes and flashy jewellery. We have stopped caring about the important things and that is why divorce rates are high and family bonds are not as strong anymore;our value system is disintegrating.To what extend do you agree or disagree?

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In our contemporary era, materialism is common among

people

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. Our priorities

such

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as love and respect have transformed into money. A significant number of marriages have ended in separation compared to the past. I believe that the most considerable reason for

this

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phenomenon is our altered values about wealth.

To begin

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with, there is no doubt that the necessary requirements to maintain a successful marriage are love and respect. In previous years, many

relationships

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were based on these values and the divorce rates were considerably lower than present rates.

However

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, as the years passed by, our intentions about family values and

relationships

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changed into expensive cars, mansions and Haute-couture dresses.

Thus

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, the lack of intimacy in

relationships

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which were built based on logic has been increasing the rates of broken homes.

For example

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, many

people

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care about their own price tags nowadays rather than self-respect.

Furthermore

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, today's young generations are growing up in broken families and they are experiencing these kinds of behaviour by learning materialism at an early age. A great number of adults buy expensive presents for their children as distraction gifts during the divorce process.

Therefore

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, younger ones have already found out that money can solve any problems and the personal bonds between families can be bought.

That is

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why, as long these behaviours are inherited to the next generations the number of

people

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who are materialistic will have increased rapidly in the future.

To conclude

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, many members of society judge

people

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by their level of wealth and the objects that they can afford to buy in the beginning, and

then

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they determine to know each other.

As a result

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, our family bonds are weaker than ever. I completely agree with

this

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statement because the foundations of

relationships

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are inaccurate to maintain over

years

Correct article usage

the years

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Submitted by ecemanginn on Sun Nov 27 2022

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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