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Band 5.5

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what soluitons can you suggest?

#internet #information #soluitons
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It is not surprising that the issue of misleading information shared and consumed using the internet has attracted many heated debates because of its impact on society as a whole. Here I will discuss the major causes relating to the already stated topic, and try to suggest some possible solutions to overcome
this
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 disturbing problem. There is no doubt that there are many solutions to tackle the aforementioned complication.
Firstly
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, the best way to deal with it is to create a sophisticated AI tool to analyse the authenticity of information before distributing it to the public.
For instance
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, to illustrate the importance of a given point would be the CISCO email profanity check tool, which eradicates the words from the mail before displaying them to the receiver.
Secondly
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, another solution is to establish law and order on spreading
such
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 content online to create deterrence among individuals. The perfect example would be the IPC which contain all the rules for any illicit act by human,
hence
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 keeping common people away from various crime.
Finally
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, a
further
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 alternative to solve the above issue is to educate society
for consuming
Change preposition
to consume
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 data only from authentic sources which will smoothen the monitoring and governance process. For ,instance mathematics
is
Wrong verb form
has been
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 in the school curriculum since childhood so as an adult we need not learn addition to perform day-to-day transactions and make a monthly budget. In conclusion, the trouble of circulation of wrong news could be sensibly and easily tackled if the above measures are taken into consideration and shared by both the concerned authorities and the general public.
Submitted by manishkj007 on

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task response
The essay addresses the task but lacks development and specific examples. The introduction and conclusion are somewhat present but need improvement. Ideas are not fully clear and comprehensive. Relevant specific examples are required to support the points made.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure is somewhat maintained with some coherence and cohesion. However, the introduction and conclusion need to be more explicit, and the supporting main points need further development and greater clarity. The essay lacks a clear and comprehensive approach which affects the coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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