IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Most people do not care enough about environmental issues. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #care
Environmental issues have always been a debatable topic
amongst
Change preposition
among
show examples
people
. Taking measurable steps in protecting the environment has always been a personal call. I hereby will discuss
as to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
why
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
most
people
 are ignorant towards
this
 issue. I do agree most
people
 do not care enough about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental issues since it does not affect them directly causing any type of major inconvenience to their lives.
People
 have grown immune to the increasing environmental hazards turning to their comfortable lifestyle. Modern society finds new ways
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 to deal with the degrading environment
hence
people
 do not directly see the harmful effects of their actions. Modernization is
also
 one of the major
cause
Fix the agreement mistake
causes
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 depleting nature. Youth these days
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 busy working and earning money to achieve
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 comfortable life. In
this
process
Add a comma
,process
show examples
 they detach themselves from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature. More and
Correct your spelling
more
show examples
ore
Correct your spelling
more
show examples
 young
people
 dream to move to larger cities for better opportunities.
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 the urban cities expand their lands by turning the small villages and towns
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 urban cities.
This
 process is called suburbanization.
Therefore
 it could be safe to say suburbanization is
also
 one of the major causes
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the degrading environmental health. To summarize, I firmly believe it is not surprising that
people
 fail to focus on the existing
ecological
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 issues and act
Correct your spelling
appropriately
appropriatly
Correct your spelling
appropriately
 to stop them
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 worsening. After all, most
people
also
 have detached themselves
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature. As
this
 continues, future generations will surely and eventually face a crisis which can alter the way they live.
Submitted by jeetkacha13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • prioritize
  • immediate needs
  • connect with
  • distant
  • abstract
  • economic considerations
  • growing awareness
  • active participation
  • initiatives
  • movements
  • impacts
  • well-being
What to do next:
Look at other essays: