People continue to commit crimes even after being punished for it. Why do you think this happens? How can crime be stopped?

It is true that some lawbreakers re-offend after serving a prison sentence or other kinds of punishment. In
this
essay, I will discuss why
this
happens and what measures we can introduce to tackle
this
problem. Ex-prisoners may continue to commit crimes mainly for two reasons.
Firstly
, the sentence may be not strict enough for them.
For example
, thieves are reported to have a high re-offending rate in some countries because the punishment for stealing is relatively loose.
Secondly
, nowadays working adults need to be well-qualified in the competitive job market, so it would be extremely difficult for ex-prisoners to apply for a position because they have no appropriate skills or qualifications.
This
means that they might have no means to make a living or support themselves financially, so they have to commit crimes again, which seems to be the easiest way for them to earn money. In order to solve the problems mentioned above, both governments and individuals should take steps. To illustrate, stringent laws should be implemented by governments to allow offenders to understand that their behaviours have negative consequences.
Besides
, rehabilitation is
also
of great importance to encourage them to develop essential life skills and help them to be better prepared for society.
For instance
, they should be encouraged to study modern information technology,
such
as programming, in prison, and
this
would be undoubtedly helpful.
Furthermore
, offenders themselves should be aware of what they have done and be determined to return to society. In conclusion, loose punishment and lack of skills are the main cause for people to re-offend.
As a result
, authorities,
as well as
lawbreakers themselves, should take measures to stop crime.
Submitted by tincel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt well and presents clear reasons for why ex-prisoners may continue to commit crimes and suggests measures to tackle the issue. However, the conclusion could be more explicit in summarizing the main points and providing a decisive solution to the problem.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay demonstrates good logical structure with clear introduction and discussion of main points. However, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main points more explicitly and providing a clear solution to the problem. Additionally, better use of cohesive devices and linkers could further improve the coherence of the essay.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: