People continue to commit crimes even after being punished for it. Why do you think this happens? How can crime be stopped?

#people #crimes #crime

It is true that some lawbreakers re-offend after serving a prison sentence or other kinds of punishment. In

this

essay, I will discuss why

this

happens and what measures we can introduce to tackle

this

problem. Ex-prisoners may continue to commit crimes mainly for two reasons.

Firstly

, the sentence may be not strict enough for them.

For example

, thieves are reported to have a high re-offending rate in some countries because the punishment for stealing is relatively loose.

Secondly

, nowadays working adults need to be well-qualified in the competitive job market, so it would be extremely difficult for ex-prisoners to apply for a position because they have no appropriate skills or qualifications.

This

means that they might have no means to make a living or support themselves financially, so they have to commit crimes again, which seems to be the easiest way for them to earn money. In order to solve the problems mentioned above, both governments and individuals should take steps. To illustrate, stringent laws should be implemented by governments to allow offenders to understand that their behaviours have negative consequences.

Besides

, rehabilitation is

also

of great importance to encourage them to develop essential life skills and help them to be better prepared for society.

For instance

, they should be encouraged to study modern information technology,

such

as programming, in prison, and

this

would be undoubtedly helpful.

Furthermore

, offenders themselves should be aware of what they have done and be determined to return to society. In conclusion, loose punishment and lack of skills are the main cause for people to re-offend.

As a result

, authorities,

as well as

lawbreakers themselves, should take measures to stop crime.

Submitted by tincel on Thu Dec 01 2022

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Task Response

Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt well and presents clear reasons for why ex-prisoners may continue to commit crimes and suggests measures to tackle the issue. However, the conclusion could be more explicit in summarizing the main points and providing a decisive solution to the problem.

Coherence and Cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay demonstrates good logical structure with clear introduction and discussion of main points. However, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main points more explicitly and providing a clear solution to the problem. Additionally, better use of cohesive devices and linkers could further improve the coherence of the essay.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People continue to commit crimes even after being punished for it. Why do you think this happens? How can crime be stopped?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Due to high unemployment rate in some countries, pupils should be offered only primary education and not secondary education since there are no jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages.If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and if so, how?

Some People Think That Success In Life Comes From Hard Work And Determination, While Others Think That There Are More Important Factors Such As Money And Appearance