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Writing Samples
Band 7

Smoking tobacco is becoming increasingly popular among young people with potentially serious effects on their health. Explain some reason for this problem and suggest some possible solutions.

#tobacco #people #effects #health #reason
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Nowadays, teenagers are becoming addicted to smoking and they spend a lot of money on their bad habits.
Moreover
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, government organisations should unite powers and help addicts smoke less for their country's future careers.
First
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, we need to find out why they take up bad habits. Most of them conform to their friends,who are influenced by social media and public environments because they think that using tobacco looks attractive. And one of the reasons is peer pressure which is increasing especially among adolescents. 
In addition
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, some
children
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 witness their own parents because of their curious behaviour and they see directly how to use it.
Furthermore
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, smoking is an expensive habit that damages their health and is addicted more. Teenagers spend their money on treating smoking-related diseases
such
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 as cancer and other serious illnesses,
Also
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 they do not know about the result that will be appeared soon.
Instead
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 of
this
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 bad habit, they can use that money for more useful things like treating themselves in a good way or helping poor
children
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 who need food and warm clothes.
Besides
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, the government have to control tobacco retailers tighter than before. Because they just focus on their profits. So they sell their goods to
children
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, who did not reach the age that confirm to purchase it,despite any laws. If they rise the prices of cigarettes, only people, who can afford them, will buy
this
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. To sum up, if we want to reduce the bad habits among adolescents, we have to exemplify them and laws must be implemented by communities, retailers and teenagers. In my opinion, we
also
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 need to ban all advertising about tobacco, because
children
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 are good at imitating things from social media and the surrounding people.
Submitted by ET21002ndgroup on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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