IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

These days some people spend a lot of money on tickets to go to sporting or events. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #money #tickets #events #development
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It is said that some
people
Use synonyms
 purchase a ticket in order to go to
events
Use synonyms
 or
stadium
Fix the agreement mistake
stadiums
show examples
 to see
playing
Add an article
the playing
show examples
 of
famous
Correct article usage
a famous
show examples
sportsman
Fix the agreement mistake
sportsmen
show examples
,
thus
Linking Words
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
 a huge amount of
money
Use synonyms
.From my point of
view
Add a comma
,view
show examples
this
Linking Words
 is positive because it is entertaining and helps
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
charity
Use synonyms
. Watching
after
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a play of
profession
Replace the word
professional
show examples
 sportsman can be grossing for lots of
sports
Use synonyms
fan
Fix the agreement mistake
fans
show examples
 as they get happy
moment
Fix the agreement mistake
moments
show examples
 by doing what they want. In
modern
Add an article
the modern
a modern
show examples
 competitive
world
Add a comma
,world
show examples
a great deal of
Change the quantifier
a lot of
many
plenty of
show examples
people
Use synonyms
work
Change the verb form
works
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their workplace , which
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not give them satisfaction and
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
 boring
time
Use synonyms
,
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
 long
time
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
day .As
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 they want
spend
Add the particle
to spend
show examples
 their valuable
time
Use synonyms
 at weekend or holidays by visiting
sports
Use synonyms
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
 or
events
Use synonyms
 of
celebraties
Correct your spelling
celebrities
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
 they love
such
Linking Words
 as rewarding
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Oscar
Correct article usage
an Oscar
show examples
 or grammy. So all of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
events
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 too
entairtaining
Correct your spelling
entertaining
 for
people
Use synonyms
 relatively their daily routine.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 in my
country
Add a comma
,country
show examples
 most fraction of
inhabitants
Correct article usage
the inhabitants
show examples
 who visit
sports
Use synonyms
 event is adult or
people
Use synonyms
 who work.
Money
Use synonyms
 which is got from
income
Add an article
the income
show examples
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 buying
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tickets goes to
Use synonyms
charity
Add an article
a charity
the charity
show examples
 which helps
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
animals and
people
Use synonyms
.
In many
Change preposition
Many
show examples
 modern companies that held
sports
Use synonyms
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
 or
events
Use synonyms
 direct their 5% of
budget
Add an article
the budget
show examples
 to
charity
Use synonyms
fond
Correct your spelling
fund
show examples
.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
 it
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
 support
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 and animal who suffer from damage.
as a result
Linking Words
 the life condition of orphans or animals becomes significantly better.
For instance
Linking Words
 , the country Russia which held
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
 cup champion of football in 2018
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
a lot
lots
show examples
 of
money
Use synonyms
 from income from
fan
Add an article
a fan
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
football to
charity
Use synonyms
/ In conclusion,
people
Use synonyms
 spend a big amount of
money
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
buying tickets in order to spend
happy
Correct article usage
a happy
show examples
time
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their family and
money
Use synonyms
 from
events
Use synonyms
 goes to supporting
charity
Use synonyms
Submitted by argyn-34 on

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