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Writing Samples
Band 6

In some countries fast food restaurants and supermarkets give money to schools to promote their product. Do you think it’s a positive or negative development of children ?

#countries #food #restaurants #supermarkets #money #schools #product #it’s #development #children
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Nowadays, advertisement is interwoven with human life. There are people who claim that manufacturers and distributors of junk
food
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, pay money to educational institutions for the promotion of
food
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 items on their premises. I strongly believe that
this
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 trend has a negative impact on
students
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. I will discuss the reasons in the essay. There are various reasons that children should avoid junk
food
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.
To begin
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 with, These
foods
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 are easily available, tasty and cheap in price.
However
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, they are low in nutrition and proteins. They contain
a
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apply
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high amounts of salt, sugar and oil , which are the prominent factors for deteriorating health.
Secondly
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, these
foods
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 are tempting and
hence
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 one can develop a habit of eating these
foods
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 on a routine basis, which could hamper the pockets of parents. Due to the easy availability of junk
foods
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, the importance of home cook
food
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 is depleting.
For example
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, In India, the majority of people are living in nuclear families and all the elder members are earning
hence
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 they can not cook for the child in
this
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 situation student has to depend on the
food
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 available in the canteen of the school.
Furthermore
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, educational organizations should understand the importance of
students
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' health. For the sake of money, authorities should not hamper the health of
students
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. Guidelines should be announced by the authorities and strict monitoring is required for the promotion of
food
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 on school premises as, manufacturers should use whole wheat bread
instead
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 of refined wheat bread. They can introduce a variety of salads which attract the
students
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.
Moreover
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, they can use fresh juice rather than carbohydrate drinks. Overall, I believe that schools should not give permission to every restaurant or supermarket to promote their
food
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 products in the canteen. If they want to sell their
food
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, they have to clear the prerequisite requirements of the authorities.
Submitted by himalibhavsar7 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • childhood obesity
  • conflict of interest
  • corporate marketing strategies
  • extracurricular programs
  • nutritional information
  • paradox
  • brand loyalty
  • sugar, fat, and sodium
  • health problems
  • educational messages
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