Mrs Barrett, an English-speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for someone to help her in her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett. In your letter: • suggest how you could help her in her home • say why you would like to do this work • explain when you will and will not be available

#mrs #barrett #woman #lives #town #someone #home #hours #summer #work

Dear Mrs. Barrett I am writing to the advert you have posted recently to inform you that I would like to be considered for the position you are offering for the next summer. As next summer, I am going to stay in town, I can do some of your stuff. I have prior experience in cleaning the house because I worked for a housing service company for 1 year when I came here.

Also

, I have previous experience in babysitting.

As a result

, I could take care of your child if you would like to. Honestly, I am saving money for the holiday that I have planned to visit my own country next year.

Consequently

, it costs me a fortune to afford the cost of accommodation and flight. So, I am quite keen on working for you.

Additionally

, for next summer, I was offered a position in the hall of residents to be responsible for catering from 9 in the morning to 3 PM.

Then

, I got a couple of hours as spare time. I would like to help you do your chores or any duties that you consider for me. I am available from June to September. I would like to be considered for

this

position and I look forward to hearing from you. Please contact me if you need any

further

details. Yours faithfully, John Smith

Submitted by bb_emperator on Tue Mar 12 2024

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Task Achievement

To improve your task response, ensure you elaborate more on how your skills and experiences specifically match Mrs. Barrett's needs. For example, mention specific tasks you can perform in her home such as cooking, gardening, or any special skill you have that could be of help.

Coherence & Cohesion

For better coherence and cohesion, consider adding transition words or phrases at the beginning of paragraphs to guide the reader through your ideas more smoothly. Additionally, make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea or topic for clarity.

Language Usage

Try to vary your sentence structure further to demonstrate a wide range of grammatical structures. This can make your letter more engaging and showcase your language proficiency better.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

228 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Domestic chores
Culinary skills
Horticulture
Cultural immersion
Work ethic
Flexible schedule
Time management
Prior commitments
Punctuality
Reliability

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