Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can is better for their overall skills development and creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree?

#activity #child #skills #development #creativity

Nowadays, some people believe that parents should decide to spend time with their children as much as possible.

Therefore

, enjoyable

activity

is an appropriate choice for modern guardians but reading

activity

has still significant in some parts. For

this

reason, I partly agree with

this

view and my personal reasons will be presented in the following details. On the one hand, there are numerous reasons why an enjoyable

activity

is accepted.

First

and foremost, enjoyable employments in young kids have a remarkable effect

for

Change preposition

show examples

supporting their evolution because in

this

age period the brain of children can rapidly respond to their surroundings than a teenager or older. As can be seen, some parents teach their kids in terms of art

that is

very simple but have a lot of efficiencies,

then

they can design their character,

color

Change the spelling

colour

show examples

, or story.

Consequently

, children who

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

created artwork tend to receive more creativity skills than others because,

for example

, writing a story must depend on imagination and various skills for establishing.

On the other hand

, enjoyable

activity

is better for children’s creativity and potential evolution, and reading employment is

also

important. It can deny that reading skill is a foundation based on everything in our life. Reading

activity

Fix the agreement mistake

activities

show examples

can help people for improving not only

Remove the article

apply

show examples

critical thinking but

also

analysis by higher capability. Practical from the historical novel, people can gain many advantages from

this

thing.

For instance

, they not only how to consider their context but

also

learned history in the past of their country. In conclusion, overall skills and creativity can enhance

Change preposition

through

show examples

both enjoyable and reading activities. Guardians should let their kids

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

do various activities, which are supporting their brains and growth.

Submitted by itemtofan on Wed Dec 07 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can is better for their overall skills development and creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree?

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, the government promotes public transport as the primary means of transportation and discourages private vehicle ownership. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation

Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones.

Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.