Many Teenagers now have their own smartphone. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this and give your own opinion
The Advanced
technology
possessed by most people
ages. Several young people
nowadays have their own smartphones
. This
essay will show one benefit and one drawback of this
issue
in terms of future
and waste
of time
.
On the one hand of this
issue
, the future
could force us to be updated with advanced technology
. For example
, many teenagers people
need advanced technology
in order
for the educational aspect to be enhanced. This
mean
, in Change the verb form
means
this
era we could not live without technology
in order
to integrate our life
in many aspects. As a result
of this
, nowadays most of the fields in our life
need to Fix the agreement mistake
lives
control
by Wrong verb form
be controlled
technologies gadget
.
On another hand of Fix the agreement mistake
technology gadgets
this
issue
,it is a waste
of time
that could perform
by Wrong verb form
be performed
smartphones
,especially for young people
due to
their sensitive age being affected by many things. For instance
, when starts
to study for an exam, most young Correct subject-verb agreement
start
people
spend most of their time
on smartphones
. To clear this
, advanced technology
has benefits as well as
drawbacks so we have to take care of our children in order
for their future
. Therefore
, parents should provide monitoring
their children and manage the Wrong verb form
monitor
time
, which is spent on smartphones
to control their time
and benefit from it.
To summarise, it might not possible
to cover all aspects of Add a missing verb
be possible
this
issue
. However
, this
essay focuses only on the future
and the waste
of time
. The most important points that have been mentioned are our life
needs to finish up many transactions by technology
and at the same time
, parents should monitor their children in order
to prevent waste
of time
. Finally
, it can be said that we should demonstrate and know very well the benefits and at the same time
drawbacks in order
to service our life
swiftly.Submitted by ghidaali1996 on
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Task Response
The essay partially addresses the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of teenagers owning smartphones. However, the points made are not fully developed and lack specific examples to support the arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure and organization of the essay are unclear. The introduction and conclusion are present but need improvement. The body paragraphs lack coherence and cohesion, leading to a disjointed flow of ideas.
Lexical Resource
The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary and fails to use precise and varied expressions. Additionally, there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrasing throughout the essay.
Grammatical Range
The essay shows a basic control of a limited range of sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical errors, including tense inconsistencies, awkward word order, and incorrect word choices.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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