IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

1.University education should be free for all students. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#university #education #students
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With the innovation of technology, tertiary
education
Use synonyms
 has become a fundamental right of every citizen. Some people claim that
universities
Use synonyms
 should not charge any fees to their students. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 narrative and
this
Linking Words
 essay will argue why free learning at the graduate level is imperative for students. Many poor students are not able to join
universities
Use synonyms
 after completion of their secondary schooling despite their interest. They cannot pursue their dreams
due to
Linking Words
 lack of funds and resources
whereas
Linking Words
 wealthy people have the privilege to send their kids to
universities
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 situation will create differences in our society and will be responsible for not only destroying our
education
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 system but
also
Linking Words
 ruining our growth. Pakistan’s literacy system is a prime example of
this
Linking Words
 scenario where rich kids study in state-of-the-art
universities
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 poor but talented kids are out of these institutes because they cannot afford it.
Consequently
Linking Words
, not having enough chances to acquire higher
education
Use synonyms
 is creating discrimination in every aspect of life.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, free
education
Use synonyms
 can play a significant role in the prosperity of the country because now intelligent children would not think about the resources.
As a result
Linking Words
, there will be more capable people for a single job position and recruiters will be indulged in a healthy argument before making a decision.
This
Linking Words
 will open the doors for the best available person
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 has the potential to lead an organization through thick and thin.
For instance
Linking Words
, selecting a suitable candidate for the commissioner's seat would be more beneficial than just awarding
this
Linking Words
 seat to the son of some political leader. Eventually, free-of-cost tertiary schooling will abolish the trend of exploitation of workers and the country will march on the route of progress. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
 essay
argued
Wrong verb form
argues
show examples
 how free-of-charge
education
Use synonyms
 can play an important role in wiping out discrimination in society and making a country prosperous.
Submitted by ikrmaamad on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure clear paragraphing with varied linking phrases to improve readability and flow of your arguments. Avoid repetitiveness by using a wider range of cohesive devices.
Task Achievement
Develop your main points more fully with detailed examples and evidence for a more persuasive argument. Your ideas should be expanded further to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
Lexical Resource
Aim to use a wider range of vocabulary, particularly less common lexical items, to enhance your essay. Avoid overuse of certain phrases and try to accurately convey more nuanced points.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Employ a broader variety of complex sentence structures. Be mindful of correct punctuation, appropriate verb tense agreement, and word order to elevate your grammatical proficiency.
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