Many of the diseases which afflict people with office jobs are the direct result of a sedentary lifestyle. Agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Undeniably, most
office
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
are sedentary, but
this
Linking Words
does not necessarily mean that any
office
Use synonyms
worker leads a sedentary lifestyle outside of the workplace.
Hence
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
some
office
Use synonyms
employees'
diseases
Use synonyms
result from their job circumstances, not all of them are attributable to these careers. It is believed that since
office
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
require the workers to sit behind a computer desk for long hours a day, they are sedentary and can cause a lot of physical and mental problems.
For instance
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
lack of physical activity creates obesity, backache, neck pains, and other physical issues. these are the direct result of immobility and low physical exertion, and they could lead to
further
Linking Words
complications for the individual
such
Linking Words
as hyperglycemia.
Moreover
Linking Words
, some mental problems arise from
this
Linking Words
life routine. examples are depression and isolation from society resulting from sitting in cubicles or damp rooms inside a busy
office
Use synonyms
building with no fresh air or contact with sunlight.
In contrast
Linking Words
, there may be other reasons for the
diseases
Use synonyms
of
office
Use synonyms
workers. they may contract a contagious disease, have unhealthy diets, have low personal hygiene standards, and suffer from genetic or hereditary
diseases
Use synonyms
.
this
Linking Words
is to say that there may be other reasons
in addition
Linking Words
to their sedentary job for their morbidity. some people may even claim that
office
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
are safer in comparison with other occupations like working in a mine or as an electrician. They argue in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of the safety of
office
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
from the physical hazards of other
jobs
Use synonyms
and it does not seem a farfetched claim. All in all, even though
office
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
are sedentary, individual habits and lifestyles outside of the workplace have the dominant effect on
diseases
Use synonyms
that a person develops.
Submitted by tracy19978688 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: