IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that dangerous sports should be banned, while others think poeple should be free to choose. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sports #poeple
The phenomenon of many
people
 attracted by high-risk sports as it allows them to challenge their bodies and mind in order to feel a sense of accomplishment has aroused wide concern among various circles. Divergent as
people
's views on
this
 issue in question may be, I personally believe it is a personal decision that should not be forbidden or jeopardized others' safety. On one hand, some
people
 stick with their view that dangerous activities should be banned because it is irresponsible to themselves, their parents, and others. Nowadays, there is a lot of news about
people
 getting injured or dying in those sports, and the rescue team
also
 needs medical care after saving the injured. Their parents regret that they have not stopped their kids from joining those activities. It is undeniable that those
people
 who are left behind or provide help are affected in a negative way.
Therefore
, some folk would support those sports should be banned.
On the other hand
, I believe that everyone should be allowed to make their own choices without causing trouble to anyone. There is no reason of forbidding the choice they made as long as they take full responsibility if
this
 is their dream.
For example
, after agreeing with the turns of "Do not resuscitate", the patient has the right not to be rescued in case of any situation on his body.
Therefore
, the decisions they made should be respected if they completely understand the risk and do not get any inconvenience to others. Under
this
 line of thinking,
although
 there are good arguments in favour of forbidding dangerous activities, I still believe that humans should have the freedom to act in order to make their dream come true.
Submitted by frankyimp on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: