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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

As a result of tourism and increasing number of people travelling, there is an growing demand for more flights. What problem does this have on the environment? What measures could be taken to solve the problems?

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Due to
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 an increasing rise in the number of tourists and tourist attractions, airports now have a pressing need to provide more aircraft for travellers.
Noise
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pollution
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 from aeroplanes and worsening global warming would negatively affect the ecosystem.
However
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, the government's policy on airport and flight regulations is key to curbing them. For a lot of reasons, the provision of more aeroplanes to meet the demand of tourists will have a devastating effect on the environment. One is that the burden of
noise
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pollution
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 from aircraft will become worse.
That is
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, especially among neighbourhoods close to airports, people are at risk of hearing problems
as a result
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 of loud
noise
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 from aeroplanes,
hence
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 resulting in the having poor health.
For instance
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, many patients recorded to have hearing impairments in teaching hospitals are found to live close to aviation centres.
Furthermore
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,
in addition
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, flight exhaust can add to global warming. The carbon monoxide waste from them would not only deteriorate the ozone layer but
consequently
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 result in people having several skin diseases or malignancies from too much exposure to ultraviolet rays.
Finally
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, to alleviate these concerns, the local authorities need to intervene.
Meaning
Wrong verb form
This means
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 that government policies are needed to regulate airport services, putting restrictions on the number of flights travelling.
Additionally
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, the construction of residential buildings around the airport should be restricted so as to reduce the stress of
noise
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pollution
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 among the citizens.
For example
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, the United Arab Emirates leadership has ensured that airports are built on the city outskirts to avoid environmental hazards. In summary,
noise
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pollution
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 and worsening global warming are worrisome complications of having too many flights travelling. Governmental intervention at different levels will go a long way to mitigate them.

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task response
Ensure that all main points are effectively supported with relevant examples and evidence.
coherence cohesion
Consider enhancing the connections between sentences and paragraphs to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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