Obesity is an increaseing public health problem in some part of the world explain some possible reason for this problem, and suggest some solution.

#obesity #health #part #world #reason

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Weight gaining is one of

topics

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the topics

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that has

been

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apply

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stirred up controversy as it is a starting point of many diseases

such

Linking Words

as cardio disease, diabetes, and more. In

this

Linking Words

essay,

causes

Correct article usage

the causes

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of the disease will be discussed and

advices

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advice

pieces of advice

bits of advice

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will be provided.

Firstly

Linking Words

, eating habit is one of the main causes. Nowadays, many foods and beverages,

such

Linking Words

as desserts, or carbonated drinks, containing high

sugar

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level

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levels

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are widely available in the market.

Furthermore

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, they are easily accessible on

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the shelf

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shelf

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shelves

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due to the high expansion of

convenient

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convenience

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stores in

neighbourhood

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the neighbourhood

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. To address

this

Linking Words

issue, increasing the

sugar

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tax by

government

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the government

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can be a way. To control the cost, manufacturers either need to lower the

sugar

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level per unit or increase its price.

Both

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In both

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ways, people will consume fewer sweets.

In addition

Linking Words

, lack of

exercise

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is another point to be considered. Because of the hectic urban lifestyle, people tend to have less personal time to do things including a workout. They perceive that a long day of working hours is already exhausting and the

exercise

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can be postponed while the work cannot. As so, consuming high calories without burning out some fats is bringing obesity to life eventually. By solving

this

Linking Words

, a workout encouragement policy by a company or government is suggested.

For example

Linking Words

, some companies in Thailand provide free

exercise

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classes after operation hours for employees or offer discounts on

gym

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a gym

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membership

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memberships

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. The benefits have received great positive feedback from staff and indirectly reduce the resignation turnover rate. In conclusion, eating

habit

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habits

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and lack of

exercise

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are two main problems that cause obesity.

Sugar

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tax control and

exercise

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encouragement policies should be applied to reduce the issue.

Submitted by minichariie on Sat Jan 07 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Obesity is an increaseing public health problem in some part of the world explain some possible reason for this problem, and suggest some solution.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?

Some people feel that entertainers such as film stars, pop musicians or sports stars are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that museums and art galleries will not be need because people can see historical objects and works of arts by computers. Do you agree or disagree