IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people are of the view that students should keep a gap of one year without study between school and university. While others think it affects learning. Discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion by giving relevant reasons and examples.

#people #students #gap #year #study #school #university #viewpoints
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 has become a trend among young adults. The topic has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
stirred up controversy worldwide. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, both sides will be discussed and my opinion will be given.
Firstly
Linking Words
, taking a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 is a great opportunity to explore life. I strongly believe it is
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
perfect timing after the students have
theorically
Correct your spelling
theoretically
study
Wrong verb form
studied
show examples
 in classes for years.
This
Linking Words
 is the appropriate
time
Use synonyms
 for them to physically explore the world by themselves.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is a chance
where
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 they can use for self-discovery, the career they want to
Add an article
a pursuit
show examples
pursuit
Replace the word
pursue
show examples
 in the future. The
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 will enable
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
 trial and error on activities they have been planning
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
,
Add a missing verb
do, such
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as travelling, taking
second
Linking Words
 language courses, or starting some businesses. Experiences gained from
such
Linking Words
 activities can help to guide the tweens to
aware
Add a missing verb
be aware
show examples
 more
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 their preferences and goals in the future.
However
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
gap
Add an article
a gap
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 could be counted as
Use synonyms
time
Correct article usage
a time
show examples
 and money
wasting
Replace the word
waste
show examples
 from
parents'
Correct article usage
the parents'
show examples
 point of view. They feel that it is useless as the youngster have not yet been fully equipped with enough knowledge. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
, the students might want to start a business but they have not learnt much about business practices. So there is a high tendency that the business will not be
success
Add an article
a success
show examples
 as it should be. Both
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
 and
time
Use synonyms
 are fully consumed and wasted.
As a result
Linking Words
,
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 case. To conclude, I strongly believe that students should take a
gap
Use synonyms
 of one
year
Use synonyms
 because it is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good chance to gain new experiences they have never faced in
classroom
Add an article
the classroom
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, it could be
time
Use synonyms
 and money wasted if they are taking the risk too high level without full knowledge.
Submitted by minichariie on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: