IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

#museums #sites #tourists #people #case #visit #places
There are controversial perspectives heating up a debate over the reason why a wealth of
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
show examples
 and historical
places
 draw attention to predominant
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 rather than locals.
This
 essay is devoted to the underlying roots, followed by some equivalent far-reaching solutions to
this
 grave problem. Without a shadow of a doubt,
museums
 are more visited by tourists for a number of reasons.
While
 foreign tourists often are more curious about
museums
 and historical sites that may widely broaden their horizon of the identities and culture of other nations, local people have a firm grasp of their own native land and have a tendency to spend time and money to explore other faraway
places
.
For example
, Nha Trang is a well-known tourist destination
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 VietNam, which is visited by the majority of
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
.
Hence
, There are more visitors who have
interest
Correct article usage
an interest
show examples
 in visiting
museums
 and historical areas than local residents. There are a bunch of methods to encourage the appearance of local inhabitants. The government should invest in services and improve financial conditions in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
appealing
places
 to create more jobs for citizens in those
places
.
For instance
, Sapa is provided financial support by the governor to help people
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
do business in that place and
therefore
 it can arouse more interest from locals.
Thus
, there are a number of ways to motivate locals to visit their own
museums
 and historical
places
.
To sum up
,
although
 many faraway tourists are more attracted to visiting
museums
 and historical sites than local ones, there are still a great many ways that can address
this
 problem.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that all aspects of the given task prompt are addressed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Organize ideas logically and ensure the essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
lexical resource
Expand vocabulary and use more varied and precise language.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure, grammar, and punctuation to improve clarity and accuracy.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: