IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Stress-related illness are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

#illness
The
problem
 of
stress
-related illness which was always debatable has now become more controversial with many
people
 claiming that it is horses while others reject
this
 notion. The substantial influence of
this
 trend has sparked controversy over its potential impact in recent years. In my opinion, the former proposition appears to be more rational.
This
 essay will
further
 elaborate on the Negative effect of
this
 trend along with some remedies to solve the
problem
 does will lead to a logical conclusion. There is a myriad of reasons which will
further
 explain
this
 argument but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that work and earn money. To explain , many
people
 feel frustrated because they cannot be earning better money which fulfils their needs of them . Another pivotal aspect of
this
 trend is that many workers spend less time with family and friends they enjoy less as well as, and they never share emotions and worries with others.
For example
,
people
 who worked for several hours in the workplace eat unhealthy food and sleep less .
As a result
, the effects of illness hit them hard. Steps to deal with
this
problem
 are many but the more significant ones are not complicated but accessible and practical
besides
,
people
 who suffer from the disease or mental
stress
 need some break, they need to spend some quality time with family go outside and take part in some recreational activities,
In other words
,
people
 should prefer healthy food which helps them reduce their
stress
. To quote an example, Everyone should need to satisfy with their money that how much they earn .
Thus
, they can relieve
stress
 as well as grow more. In conclusion, According to the argument aforementioned above, one can reach a conclusion that the
problem
 of
stress
 can be successfully addressed, provided that the above-stated measure is taken.
Submitted by prabhgill1621 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: