Some people believe that sport should be a compulsory school subject while others argue that children should only study academic subjects like maths and history at school. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Sport
is very useful
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
for the growth of some children. As we know, in many schools there are a lot of
subjects
such
as math, geography, history and many others which provide the development of
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
brain. In
this
essay, I am going to discuss these two faces of the same reality and define, in my opinion, which one is the best
way
to follow.
First
of all, there exist some sports which involve children
to challenge
Change the verb form
challenging
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each other or playing together as a club.
For instance
, if we refer to football or basketball or volleyball, these are the favourite games
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
by many
students
during their
relaxtime
Correct your spelling
relax time
. Needless to say that several schools in the world include
sport
as a real subject which is considered a
way
of relaxing
students
' bodies from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other activities. For
this
reason,
students
prefer
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
than
Change preposition
to
show examples
other
subjects
which require bigger
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
by their intelligence and are not always so excited and funny.
On the other hand
,
subjects
such
as math, geography and history open children's brain by building something
concret
Correct your spelling
concrete
and much more related to the reality of all days. A young boy who spends most of his time simply playing football,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is not always the best
way
to follow in order to build his future. Many
students
think that several people who belong to the
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
world,
such
as football players, lead by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example and can be the key
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
success in the future.
However
, only
subjects
Correct quantifier usage
such as
show examples
as
Change preposition
like
show examples
the
previously
Replace the word
previous
show examples
ones provide a crucial step closer to the adult age and can afford
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students
to realize their dreams. In summary,
sport
is a great
way
to bring up our bodies but, in my opinion, it does not reserve so much time during the early years of a young boy in a school context which is remain a good
way
to break away as well.
Submitted by grasso694 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Compulsory
  • School curriculum
  • Physical education
  • Cognitive development
  • Teamwork
  • Discipline
  • Physical health
  • Academic performance
  • Core subjects
  • Well-rounded
  • Educational prospects
  • Extra-curricular activities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: