Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your won opinion.

People have different views about who plays a more important role for
children
to be a proper
participant
Fix the agreement mistake
participants
show examples
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
society. While some people agree that
school
has
responsible
Replace the word
responsibility
show examples
for it, I believe that its accomplishment needs both
parents
and teachers. It is no doubt that
children
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
influenced by
Correct pronoun usage
their parents’s
show examples
parents’s
Remove the s
parents’
show examples
personality traits particularly their
conducts
Fix the agreement mistake
conduct
show examples
because
parents
are
children
‘s teachers before being educated. Until they go to
school
, there are hardly
social
Correct quantifier usage
any social
show examples
activities even little older friends. The majority of
students
spend plenty of time on their grades rather than
interpersonal
Change preposition
on interpersonal
show examples
skills
such
as
communicate
Wrong verb form
communicating
show examples
,
listen
Wrong verb form
listening
show examples
and
handle
Wrong verb form
handling
show examples
conflicts.
Conversely
,
parents
are easy to utilize their daily events and take these as examples teaching their
children
.
On the other hand
, I can understand the arguments
Correct pronoun usage
that support
show examples
support
Wrong verb form
supporting
show examples
liability
Correct article usage
the liability
show examples
of
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
for teaching. The reason for
this
view is that
school
is a
micro society
Add a hyphen
micro-society
show examples
for
children
and teachers should manage and guide them to become better not just study hard.
For example
, when a fight
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
happened among
students
, it is reasonable to solve
by
Correct pronoun usage
it by
show examples
their teacher who can teach those
students
to judge whether or not their conduct is correct and forgiven after apology
instead
of their own
parents
. Obviously, the teacher is no respecter of his or her
students
and protecting their own child is the instinct of
parents
. To conclude, there are good reasons why
school
should improve the
children
to be excellent members
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
society, but in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
it will do more with less if there is
guidance
Add an article
the guidance
a guidance
show examples
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
parents
for them
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
free time.
Submitted by pengxiaoting_1995 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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