These days many people prefer online shopping to conventional shopping. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvatages?

Nowadays, the majority of people likely to shop online than traditional shopping.

This

writer argues that the positives of discounting prices and avoiding limitations outweigh the drawbacks of personal interaction. The most advantageous factor of shopping online is the wide selection from many shops, giving them a comfortable environment for spending.

In other words

customers

can choose products from different prices,

materials

Correct word choice

and materials

show examples

which are suitable and not available in social life. From prior knowledge, the rate of shopping online has increased in recent years in many countries

then

led to the expansion of the online industry.

Thus

, the new shopping way on the

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

brings benefits to all inhabitants all over the world by the way it delivers to users. Another impact of shopping on the Internet is that consumers have the ability to shop everywhere. It cannot be denied that people do shopping at home, schools, and companies.

This

is on account of the convenience when

customers

just need to turn on their smart devices and go to the website they want, from many countries there are a lot of shops providing purchasers with a good service in spending. Thereby,

customers

can easily get what they need in an advisable way.

However

, a few people are dissatisfied with

this

statement. They believed that classical shopping always be the best because shopping online sometimes causes problems

due to

shipping

such

as delays which put them waiting for a long time for their products.

Moreover

, the shipping

also

can crack commodities if they are not careful.

Consequently

, basic shopping leads them to have personal interactions and check before buying. Taking everything into account, the higher prices of universal shopping are outweighed by the unlimited choice on the internet.

Hence

, shopping online can have more benefits for

customers

Fri Apr 19 2024

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Grammar

Consider revising minor grammatical errors to enhance clarity. For example, 'the majority of people likely to shop online than traditional shopping' could be corrected to 'the majority of people are more likely to shop online than engage in traditional shopping.'

Sentence Structure

Enhance your essay by incorporating more varied and complex sentence structures. This will help to demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.

Supporting Evidence

To further strengthen your argument, consider including more specific examples and data. This could involve citing studies or statistics to support your points about the benefits of online shopping.

Expression Clarity

Be mindful of the accuracy in the expression of ideas. For instance, 'not available in social life' might be more accurately phrased as 'not available in physical stores or traditional shopping venues.'

Balanced Argument

Effectively addresses both sides of the argument, showing a balanced view.

Topic Sentences

Good use of topic sentences to introduce each paragraph.

Conclusion

Successfully concludes with a clear summary of the main points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

296 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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These days many people prefer online shopping to conventional shopping. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvatages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might be this case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

In some countries, the role of a mother differs in some ways from the role of a father. Why do you think these differences exist? How might parental roles develop in the future?

20.The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were suitable and livable for people in those times. What problems will these ancient towns cause today? And what should be done to deal with that?

Many people are working at home rather than work place. Some people believe this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, but other suggest it will cause stress in the home. Discuss both views and give your opinion.