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Band 6.5

Some people believe that education is the key to tackling hunger worldwide while others feel that the answer is in food aid. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #education #hunger #food #aid
The majority of
people
 are still arguing about what
factor
Fix the agreement mistake
factors
show examples
 will help to reduce the level of hunger in the world. While some individuals say that
education
 will improve the situation, others believe that immediate
food
 aid is a better solution. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 educating
people
 on how to handle resources efficiently is more productive. Both views will be discussed in
this
 essay. On the one hand, the most considerable benefit that
food
 aid brings to the table is that it solves
food
hanger
Correct your spelling
hunger
show examples
 straightforwardly and quickly.
Moreover
, it will be a good option for
people
 in underdeveloped countries in which individuals do not have the opportunity to afford proper
education
. Donating
food
 to famine areas is the solution that requires the least resources to help
people
 with
food
 insecurity.
For example
, when
people
 face chronic
food
 shortages in Vietnam, usually after natural disasters,
food
 banks
created
Add a missing verb
are created
show examples
 and ready
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 every person.
However
, I do not agree with
this
 side because that’s just a temporary solution to the problem.
On the other hand
, there are several reasons why
education
 can help to solve world hunger more effectively.
First
 of all, if
people
 are better educated, they can get better jobs and hunger disappears as a problem.
Secondly
,
this
 would be a good opportunity for poorer countries to develop their agriculture and help them to be independent
from
Change the preposition
of
show examples
 rich countries.
For instance
, a farmer with
education
 has a much greater chance of helping to increase agricultural production than a farmer without
education
. In conclusion, even though
people
 say that providing
food
 aid will reduce the problem
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 starvation, I think
education
 is the best way to end the worldwide
food
 crisis.
Submitted by Allazhar on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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