New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time #outweigh

It is commonly seen that the development of technology makes youngsters' free time different. There are both merits and demerits, and I believe that the befits are greater than

its

Change the word

the

show examples

drawbacks.

To begin

with, some people believe that the latest technology has a positive impact on juveniles.

First

of all, it provides them more various ways

such

as watching some videos on youtube or Netflix to relieve their stress. For

this

reason, they could rest

more well

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

and study well.

In addition

, they can study whatever they want to without restrictions on time and space.

This

point can increase their opportunity to study and accessibility of information.

However

, others think that children can be affected positively by highly developed technology.

First

and foremost, they can be addicted

Change preposition

show examples

using it because youngsters usually tend to choose what they could give fun

Change preposition

with.

show examples

Secondly

, these kinds of technologies are commonly used in seat positions. It can cause sedentary life to them.

Furthermore

this

lifestyle can cause serious health problems to them because at that age people should spend their day actively. In conclusion,

although

some people claim that new technologies have a positive impact on youngsters, I strongly believe that there are more drawbacks.

Therefore

, their parents have to manage their way to use it.

Submitted by kws99132 on Mon Jan 16 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

213 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

advantages
disadvantages
new technologies
children
free time
access
educational resources
information
development
key skills
enhancing
creativity
imagination
opportunity
connect
convenience
flexibility
lack
physical activity
potential
health issues
impact
social
emotional development
exposure
inappropriate content
addiction
dependency

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is positive or negative development?
I think it is beneficial that goods like food, cars, furniture and clothes that are produced in a certain part of the world are now available almost everywhere, which means the similarities between various countries are growing.
4.5
band
You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment.In your letter #describe the problem with the equipment #Explain how this problem is affecting your work #say what you want the shop or company to do
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to need to your help.First of all,I introduce myself.My full name is Komiljonova Komilaxon.I work at home.I use with laptop.I have a online shop.I sell different of clothes and shoes.Now,I describe the problem.Suddenly,my laptop turned off when I was using it.Then I look,there is no charge left.The first problem is I do not have laptop charger.That's why,I want to ask you one thing is charger.I really need it.If you do not give me charger,this problem will affect my work.My project will stop.Then what do I do?I have a lot of customers to order from me.I really need money.If my job stops,who will pay for the problems in my house but me? I would like to you will give me charger.I hope your equipment is cheaper than another shops.I think that your shop's equipments are che...
<4
band
Plan A below shows a health centre in 2005. Plan B shows the same place in the present day. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and making comparisons where relevant.
These maps illustrate the transformation of a student building over 10 years.
<4
band
You recently started commuting to work by bicycle and discovered that there is a problem with bicycle parking near the building where you work. 1) Explain the reason for using a bicycle to commute 2) what problems have you encountered with parking 3) what are your recommendations to solve the problem
I am writing to bring your attention to the unavailability of parking space for bicycle in your building. I am house that you would solve it as soon as possible.
<4
band
Now, many scientific institutes conduct research on live animals. Some people regard it as cruel and unnecessary while others believe it is justified in the interest of human welfare. Discuss the two views and give your reasons. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In this modern world, many researchers have conducted many experiments and research on live animals. Despite the positive result, many people think that this action is reckless. Hence, in this essay I will discuss both point of views and present my opinion in this case.

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is positive or negative development?

Plan A below shows a health centre in 2005. Plan B shows the same place in the present day. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and making comparisons where relevant.