IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic. Whoever controls the media also controls opinions and attitudes of the people and there is little can be done to rectify this. To what extend do you agree or disagree? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

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The data illustrates the
students
Change to a genitive case
student's
students'
show examples
 proportions of four types of secondary school in three periods of
year
Add an article
the year
show examples
 (2000, 2005, and 2009). The Secondary
schools
Use synonyms
 were categorized
by
Change preposition
as
show examples
 Specialist
Schools
Use synonyms
, Grammar
Schools
Use synonyms
, Voluntary-controlled
Schools
Use synonyms
, and Community
Schools
Use synonyms
. At
first
Linking Words
 glance, the number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pupils
Change to a genitive case
pupil's
pupils'
show examples
 attendance dropped slowly over the timeframe.
However
Linking Words
, The Community
Schools
Use synonyms
 expand over the end of periods. There
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
Correct article usage
a dramatical
show examples
dramatical
Replace the word
dramatic
show examples
 fall
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 numerous school
pupils
Change noun form
pupils'
pupil's
show examples
 visitation throughout the timeframe at three institutions. Voluntary-controlled
Schools
Use synonyms
 became the most institution plunged which stood at 52% in 2000. Not only jumped to 38% in 2005
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 to 20 % in 2009. Followed by Grammar
Schools
Use synonyms
 that dropped a half
attandance
Correct your spelling
attendance
 (twelve
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
) in 2009 than in 2000 (24%). Whereas Specialist
Schools
Use synonyms
 did not particularly
changed
Change the verb form
change
show examples
. Despite that, it hit a low of numbers at 10% in 2009.
In contrast
Linking Words
, The Community
Schools
Use synonyms
,
stood
Correct pronoun usage
which stood
show examples
 at 12% in 2000 and increased
a
Change preposition
by a
show examples
fifth in 2015, became popular among children
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
. In
Linking Words
additionally
Replace the word
addition
show examples
, it was the highest visitor of the four
schools
Use synonyms
 which was reaching a peak of 58% in 2019.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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