Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

#people #music #cultures #ages

Many

people

believe that uniting

people

from different cultures and ages through

music

is a brilliant idea. It is true that I have experienced getting together with numerous

youths

from over a hundred countries under the

YMCA

song

during the annual global gathering.

Also

, singing a

song

is one healthy lifestyle of releasing

stress

as we notice that there are many karaokes all around the world.

Moreover

music

is another way of ritual habit for Christians as worship. I believe that

music

unites

people

all together through unseen strings

YMCA

world is the most motivated and oldest movement for

youths

from 121 countries setting up local movements. Annually, youth representatives gather in a certain place to raise the voices of difficulties that we challenge.

Then

, we are united to commit to working on the struggles to be solved in cooperation with other organizations

such

as the UN, WHO, and the world bank.

Therefore

, you might wonder how

youths

YMCA

can accomplish worldwide to advocate for other

youths

in need. We are united together through the

YMCA

theme

song

which was composed in the 1970s.

Finally

music

is a powerful tool to motivate

youths

to take an action for certain purposes. Singing a

song

is a healthy way to relieve the

stress

in your brain which was scientifically approved.

Therefore

, there is karaoke on every single corner of the street. Karaoke is the best place to set your

stress

free meanwhile karaoke business makes a profit. In Christianity, worshipping is another way of ritual. Christians believe that worshipping means respecting God.

Otherwise

, worshipping helps to relieve your burdens from your mentality. To sum up, I strongly agree that

music

gets

people

closer

people

even though we are different from each other ethnically and racially.

Also

, I have experienced in my life how the theme

song

encouraged me to take an action as uniting with friends from other nationalities.

Then

music

is the most enjoyable means of releasing your

stress

away by singing and giving honour to God by worshipping.

Submitted by sun_shine159 on Thu Jan 19 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 3 - Discussion
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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

339 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

Fully explain your ideas

Organising a large family celebration such as a wedding can often create problems. What can be problems associated with organising a large family event and what solutions can you suggest? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant from your own knowledge and experience.

some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. why is this the case? do you think this is a posotive or a negative development?

Public libraries should only provide books and should not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. Do you agree or disagree?