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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The best way to solve the world’s environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuels. Do you agree or disagree?

#world’s #cost #fuels
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The proposition that increasing the cost of fuels is the best solution to the world's environmental problems is a complex and contentious issue.
While
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 it may have some merit in certain contexts, I ultimately disagree with
this
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 statement for several reasons.
Firstly
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,
while
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 higher
fuel
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costs
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 may incentivize individuals and industries to reduce their
fuel
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 consumption and transition to cleaner alternatives, it could disproportionately affect low-income individuals and developing economies. Higher
fuel
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 prices could lead to increased
costs
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 of living, particularly for essential goods and services that rely on transportation, heating, or electricity.
This
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 could exacerbate socioeconomic inequalities and hinder progress towards poverty alleviation.
Secondly
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, focusing solely on increasing
fuel
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costs
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 overlooks other effective strategies for addressing environmental issues. Policies that promote renewable energy adoption, energy efficiency improvements, sustainable transportation options, and conservation efforts can all contribute to mitigating environmental degradation without disproportionately burdening vulnerable populations. A comprehensive approach that combines various strategies tailored to different contexts is likely to be more effective in addressing the multifaceted nature of environmental challenges.
Furthermore
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, increasing
fuel
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costs
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 may not necessarily lead to significant reductions in greenhouse gas emissions or other forms of environmental pollution. Inelastic demand for
fuel
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 in certain sectors,
such
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 as aviation or heavy industry, may limit the effectiveness of price-based interventions.
Additionally
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, without complementary measures to support innovation and investment in clean technologies, higher
fuel
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costs
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 could simply result in higher profits for fossil
fuel
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 producers without significantly reducing environmental harm. In conclusion,
while
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 increasing the cost of fuels may be one tool in a broader toolkit for addressing environmental problems, it is not the best or sole solution. A more balanced and holistic approach that considers social, economic, and environmental factors is needed to effectively tackle the world's environmental challenges.
This
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 approach should prioritize equitable solutions that promote sustainable development and ensure that the burden of environmental action is shared fairly across society.
Submitted by cathyngo1512 on

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task achievement
Ensure to directly address the question in both the introduction and the conclusion to make your stance clear from the outset. While you disagreed with the statement, a more explicit thesis statement could enhance clarity.
task achievement
Consider integrating more specific examples or case studies to support your arguments. This would not only make your essay more convincing but also demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider varying your transition phrases more effectively. While your essay flows well, using a wider range of linking words can improve readability and the logical flow between ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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