Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that modern technology as
an
Correct article usage
the
Internet
makes people
chattier, while
others think that their
stacking behind the computer and become less sociable. I thinkReplace the word
they're
they are
,
it depends on Remove the comma
apply
behaviour
of Add an article
the behaviour
person
. Add an article
a person
the person
In
Change preposition
This
this
essay will discussed
both Change the verb form
discuss
of
Change preposition
apply
view
.
Fix the agreement mistake
views
Firstly
, cutting-edge technologies made a big breakthrough step in developing humanity. Using Internet
gives easy access to something. Nowadays, most Correct article usage
the Internet
people
cannot imagine their life without Internet
, because, students may study online, Add an article
the Internet
people
may communicate with Correct word choice
and people
whole
world. It makes hands longer and Change the article
the whole
people
became more sociable. People
have become more mobile. Because they earn money online. They make Add an article
the meeting
a meeting
meeting
, programming, Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
shopping
online. Correct word choice
and shopping
For example
, in the USA during the pandemic time, most people
moved from California to another states
, where taxes Replace the adjective
another state
other states
more
less. They worked in one state and lived in other.
Change the word
apply
On the other hand
, with modern technologies
Add a comma
,technologies
people
have video games which is
not always good for children. Most of them have a habit to play without break Change the verb form
are
instead
of walking on playgrounds and play
with other children. Parents surf Wrong verb form
playing
the
social media Correct article usage
apply
instead
of talk
with their Change the verb form
talking
child
. Most of them have Fix the agreement mistake
children
an
Correct article usage
apply
Internet
addiction. Although
, the
elder Correct article usage
apply
people
, who works
online Change the verb form
work
needs
more Correct subject-verb agreement
need
communicate
with others. Usually, they Replace the word
communication
stuck
behind the computer and did not see others. Add a missing verb
are stuck
In addition
, with
Change preposition
by
developing
Replace the word
development
online
payment, there are discovered a cybercrime.
In my opinion, Change preposition
of online
people
should find happy
medium between using modern technology and being Add an article
a happy
the happy
on
Change preposition
in
real time
. Society should take some benefits Add a hyphen
real-time
such
as freelancing, developing their communication skills and having friends.Submitted by Allazhar on
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Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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