Children brought up in families with less money are better prepared for life than those from wealthy families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is thought that children who grew up in
families
with less
money
are better prepared for life than those from rich
families
. I totally agree with
this
suggestion because children from poor
families
know more lifehacks and they know how to keep and spend
money
correctly. First and foremost, they know lifehacks which,
for example
, allow them to spend less on some items and services. Being brought up in a family with small opportunities means that if you want to buy something, you can wait
for example
for a bargain or seek for less price.
Moreover
, they can be taught by their parents how to spend less amount of
money
on utility bills. Take
for instance
research from the state financial University of England which illustrates that those adults who were brought up in poor
families
are more well-prepared for life by knowing a lot of hacks.
Furthermore
, they know how to save and spend
money
correctly.
This
is because in childhood when they wanted to purchase a chocolate bar for themselves they were obligated to save
money
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
birthdays or other holidays. As
grown-ups
Add a comma
,grown-ups
show examples
they know the principles of financial accuracy, and if they saw an advertising campaign, they would first think
whether
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
this
item is needed or not.
For example
, one of the popular advertising
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
showed statistics about how many people were caught by advertisements, and
this
data illustrates that adults from poor
families
spend their
money
more carefully rather than those from wealthy
families
. In conclusion, I totally agree with
this
statement because adults from poor
families
tend to know lifehacks and
be
Change the verb form
are
show examples
more careful with
money
.
Submitted by prostoy.pacan4ek on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: