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Writing Samples
Band 8

Many people are interested in how banks work. The Mechanisms of Banking: Understanding the Interplay between Savers and Borrowers

#people #banks #work #mechanisms #interplay #savers #borrowers
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The banking system is a complex structure that plays a vital role in promoting economic growth and development. At its core, it is designed to facilitate the flow of money between saving and borrowing individuals, serving two main categories of customers: savers and borrowers.
Although
 these two groups may seem disparate, their interactions are inextricably linked, forming a symbiotic relationship
that is
 the lifeblood of the banking system. Investors accumulate their money in a deposit account, which is
then
 housed and managed at a local branch. They
then
 earn interest on their deposits, which provides a tangible incentive to save.
As a result
. The interest collected from the loaners is in turn used to pay for their activities, who keep their wages in savings accounts, creating a self-sustaining cycle. The symbiotic relationship between a saver and someone who asks for cash is the lifeblood of the banking system. Indeed, Banks act as intermediaries, channelling funds from savers to borrowers and making a profit in the process.
This
 process is critical to economic growth because it facilitates the flow of capital to individuals and businesses, allowing them to invest, innovate and create jobs.
Moreover
, the banking scheme provides clients with a safe and secure environment to store their wealth, encouraging thrift and financial discipline. In conclusion, banking is a delicate balance between the first and the second groups, with finance serving as the linchpin that connects both. By understanding the interaction between people and banks, we can
also
 appreciate the critical role that banking plays in promoting economic growth and development.
While
 the banking structure continues to evolve, it is important to recognize the complex relationships between these stakeholders and ensure that the structure remains stable, efficient and responsive to the needs of all parties involved.
Submitted by lioness1970 on

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Task Achievement
Enhance the essay by incorporating more specific examples and case studies to illustrate the mechanisms of banking in practical terms. This would make your arguments more compelling and grounded in reality.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider diversifying your sentence structures and employing a wider range of linking devices to improve the flow of ideas and add sophistication to your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Provided a clear and structured introduction and conclusion that effectively framed the essay.
Task Achievement
Successfully identified and explained the fundamental roles of savers and borrowers in the banking system.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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