Living in big cities is bad for health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#cities #health

this

modern era,

people

love big

cities

because there are a lot of activities after

work

. But living in these

cities

can harm your health. I do agree because in big

cities

air

pollution is the number one problem and

also

there are a lot of crimes happening every day.

Firstly

, most of the population prefer to

work

in big

cities

because their

work

areas are accessible

public

Change preposition

by public

show examples

transportation or by walking. But

on the other hand

, too much different types of public transportation

such

as trains, buses and taxis.

This

can cause

air

pollution that can be dangerous to our health.

For example

, new york. Most

people

often walk going to

work

. And every day they are inhaling

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

polluted

air

Correct your spelling

show examples

they cannot yet feel the effect of it but when they will get older, they will be facing lung diseases

due to

air

pollution.

Secondly

, big

cities

attracted

people

work

here with the idea of having a good future. Because there are

people

out there encouraging them that there is various

work

. But they do not know that the cost of living is

also

expensive. And in the end, they will be struggling with their monthly expenses. And because of ,

this

they will end up doing crimes.

For example

, snatchers and

holdapers

Correct your spelling

holders

. By using knives or guns to threaten their victims to ask for their

cellphones

Correct your spelling

cell phones

show examples

or money. But if they did not get anything from you, they will end up hurting you. In conclusion, it is really nice to live in big

cities

because they have access to everything

such

as big shopping malls, nice restaurants and big companies but in exchange for

this

is your prone to health issues.

Submitted by athena26 on Sat Jan 28 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

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Lexical resource: 5.0

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Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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