Topic: Many children and students are taught to push themselves to be better than others rather than work together for everyones’s benefits. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#topic #children #students #work #everyones’s

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Many

children

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are often taught by their parents or teachers to work hard on their own and get better than others,

while

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less effort has been devoted to educating them about cooperation and teamwork. From my way of thinking,

this

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approach to education certainly has advantages, but the disadvantages seem to be more significant. In

this

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essay, I will delve into my thoughts in detail. We begin with the pros of the argument. In today's society, competitions happen at every school and workplace. That said, pushing oneself to be better keeps

one

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's mind sharp and helps

one

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perform best. In that way,

one

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can possibly stand out when competing with others. Take the university entrance exams in many Asian countries

for example

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, a student definitely has to stand out in order to get accepted by a top-tier institute and he or she has almost no room for failure.

Therefore

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, having a competitive mind is necessary.

On the other hand

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, pushing too hard can do more harm than good.

One

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obvious downside is that it creates excessive stress, which could cause health issues. Apart from that,

children

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easily get more isolated when they are digging deep into their own work. From time to time, they become less social and could have trouble communicating with others. Today we live in a society where everyone is a part of the whole and being able to communicate and work with other people is essential. Without proper social skills, life could be difficult.

To conclude

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although

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children

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do need to push themselves to get better,

this

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has to be done carefully. Parents and teachers have to be mindful of the amount of pressure they put on

children

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. At the same time, they definitely need to educate them on the importance of social abilities and encourage them to cooperate with their mates.

Submitted by rlu3 on Mon Jan 30 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

306 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Instilling
Competitive spirit
Self-improvement
Personal excellence
Excessive competition
Stress
Anxiety
Win-at-all-costs mentality
Interpersonal relationships
Collaboration skills
Teamwork
Mutual success
Wider community
Educational settings
Social development
Groundbreaking achievements
Collective effort

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Topic: Many children and students are taught to push themselves to be better than others rather than work together for everyones’s benefits. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Health services are a basic necessity. However, private companies have made them quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years, there has been a rise in the use of performance-enhancing drugs in sports. What are the consequences of doping for athletes? What measures should be taken to combat this issue?