IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

some people think that it is more bebeficial to take part in sports which are playedin teams like football. but other think taking part in individual sports are better, like swimming. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #part #sports #playedin #teams #football
there is a current debate surrounding whether
team
sports
 or individual
sports
 are more advantageous for
people
. personally, I think both types of
sports
 play an important role
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
people
 to improve their mental and physical health. on the one hand, those who advocate
team
sports
 may point to its benefits on social
skills
. it is worth mentioning that partaking in
team
sports
 help
people
 to improve their communication
skills
 and understand the value of solidarity. in
team
sports
, the likelihood of victory relies heavily on the relationships of members of a
team
.
therefore
, they need to strengthen their bond with each other which can help them to have more opportunities to win the game and develop their interpersonal
skills
.
for example
, the key to winning a football match is an in-depth understanding of other members'
skills
 that can only know through long-term exposure. by that way,
people
 can absorb the core value of solidarity.
on the other hand
, individual
sports
 are an indispensable part to develop
people
's own abilities. playing individual
sports
 assist
people
 to understand themselves thoroughly.
as a result
, they are able to realize their strength and weakness that need to be improved and curbed. from that,
people
 can develop their
sports
skills
 in a comprehensive way.
moreover
, playing individual games makes
people
 focus more on their targets because there are no external factors that can disturb them from their goals.
for instance
, those who play chess are likely to develop their
skills
 dramatically in a short period
due to
 their serious concentration on themselves in conclusion, I strongly believe that each type of sport has certain benefits for
people
.
therefore
, they should play both
team
sports
 and individual
sports
 to develop in a complete way.
Submitted by bobong120906 on

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