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Band 5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think it is negative or positive development?

#countries #home #people #be #case #development
In some countries,
purchase
Wrong verb form
purchasing
show examples
 a
house
 is more crucial
instead
 of
rental
Replace the word
renting
show examples
 for
house
Add an article
the house
a house
show examples
.
This
, in my
opinion
Add the comma(s)
,opinion
show examples
result
Correct subject-verb agreement
results
show examples
 from the mind of
boomer
Correct article usage
the boomer
show examples
generation
 where every human being should have their own building. It should be viewed as
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 development because it can be harmful
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
younger
Correct article usage
the younger
show examples
generation
’s
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
. Most of
oldest
Correct article usage
the oldest
show examples
generation
 may give advice to
latter
Correct article usage
the latter
show examples
generation
 that it is
benefial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 to have our own
house
 as a building that can live in forever. It is happen because
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 their ages, it is easier to get
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
home because of mostly their salaries
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 high enough compared to their monthly expenses, so they can save plenty of money. In fact, a lot of houses in cities in
numeous
Correct your spelling
numerous
 countries has owned by
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
 age and even they may have more than one
house
 in their country.
Unfortuntely
Correct your spelling
Unfortunately
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young ages nowadays mostly can not afford to buy their
house
 and choose to rent a flat
bacause
Correct your spelling
because
 the price of houses
is increase
Change the verb form
is increasing
is increased
show examples
 significantly
whereas
 their
financial
Change the word
financially
show examples
 unstable. Renting a
house
 is more realistic
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 young age because they can afford
Correct article usage
a building
show examples
building
Change the verb form
to build
show examples
 for living
also
Correct word choice
and also
show examples
 sufficient for their basic necessity
such
 as groceries, electricity, internet connection and so on. And
this
 is what
mostly
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 did to balance
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
. In conclusion,
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
 money to buy a
house
 gives advantageous so we can live in our own home ever after without thinking of
pay
Wrong verb form
paying
show examples
 for
monthly
Correct article usage
the monthly
show examples
flat’s
Change noun form
flat
show examples
 bill. Sadly,
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
such
generation
Change preposition
as generation
show examples
millenial
Correct your spelling
millennial
millennials
 and
generation
 Z mostly can not buy
private
Add an article
a private
show examples
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
, so it is risky for their
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Homeownership
  • Property ladder
  • Real estate
  • Mortgage
  • Equity
  • Inflation hedge
  • Stability
  • Long-term investment
  • Asset
  • Liability
  • Housing market
  • Tenure
  • Down payment
  • Property taxes
  • Maintenance costs
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