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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

#aim #science #people #lives
It is debatable whether
science
 should be beneficial for
society
.
Science
 has been believed for its benefits which at present we take advantage of.
In addition
, Numerous experiments done in the past brought a vast improvement in one’s life.
Therefore
,
this
 essay will put forward the reason why it is believed that
science
 should be subjective to societies’ development.
To begin
 with, the research, sometimes faced with trials and errors, done by scientists was not solely the result of their own effort. It
also
 needs support from the community and the government since it requires a lot of money as well.
Thus
, it is their moral responsibility to contribute as much as
society
 has given them opportunities. If they fail to give back to
society
, they will gain trust issues from
society
 and it will put them in difficulties in conducting an experiment later.
Furthermore
, the development made by the researchers could continuously be improved by future scientists if it has advantages for mankind as we always struggle with new challenges
such
 as novel viruses, take the example of coronavirus. If the past researcher had no idea how virus reproduced and mutated, we all would have died and we cannot be where we are today.
As a result
, scientists in the present can learn from previous studies and make innovations and people can live better lives,
while
 they
also
 learn to appreciate
science
. In conclusion,
science
 should be designed for our lives for the sake of our sustainability as we always experience new challenges in life
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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improvement
Try to strengthen your main points with more specific examples and evidence. This will help to illustrate your arguments more vividly and increase the persuasiveness of your essay.
improvement
Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea supported by examples or elaborations. This will enhance the coherence of your essay.
improvement
Clarify some of your complex sentences to ensure that your readers fully understand your points, maintaining the clarity of ideas throughout the essay.
strength
The essay presents a clear and relevant contention related to the topic, engaging with the idea that science's main aim should be to benefit society.
strength
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, providing a sensible beginning and a succinct summary of the key points.
strength
The essay shows a logical progression of ideas, moving from the role and responsibility of scientists to specific challenges they can address for societal benefit.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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