Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people’s lives. Others believe that adult life brings more happiness despite greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

The way
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
enjoy
Change the verb form
enjoys
show examples
life today is vary. It can be achieved by doing simple things and even complicated ways.
However
, for some people, a teenager is happier than others but others view
also
assume that adolescence gets more enjoyment.
However
, in
teenage
Correct pronoun usage
their teenage
show examples
, they will get more time to express their interest and less stress regarding the low tension that they have. When society
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
adults, they will face
real-lifelife
Correct your spelling
real-life life
real-life-life
tasks and tension. The pressure comes from their self and family or workplace.
Nevertheless
, they accept it as a challenge and strive to make it come true, even though it is hard and requires a lot of effort, but it is done to make their life more prosperous.
Further
, they will get satisfaction feeling through the appreciation that comes from their family or workplace.
For instance
, when a Father works hard for his wife and children, He will maximize his effort on getting money to finance them.
As a result
, the sacrifice that he has turns into happiness feeling that makes his life better.
However
, in the other's opinion, a teenager is freer and can do everything that they want. They
also
still rely on their parent for every single decision and needs.
This
will make them happier, because no more stress and pressure.
In addition
, when they failed to achieve the target, their circumstance will not judge and blame them for the failure. It is because they still growing up to be adolescence. Another reason that makes them happier is their way of thinking is still in development. I do believe that
this
is caused by their brain which will not take it more seriously and let them happen as it should be without thinking about what will happen next.
This
is completely different when it happens to the adult. They will have more thinking which
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
Fix the infinitive
to
show examples
stress about the thing that would be caused by it.
To conclude
,
adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples
and
teen
Fix the agreement mistake
teens
show examples
have their own reason for their happiness level.
However
, with
regards
Fix the agreement mistake
regard
show examples
to responsibility and pressure, a teenager has a lower level compared to adolescence.
Thus
, the happiness feeling is greatly possessed by people in
teenage
Correct pronoun usage
their teenage
show examples
.
Submitted by yuliasintiaputri100 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: