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Writing Samples
Band 5

The use of social media, such as Facebook and Twitter, is replacing face-to-face contact in this century. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#media #facebook #twitter #contact #century #outweigh
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The utilization of social media in our world has made communication around the globe easier and has taken place over physical communication.
This
 influences the public positively and negatively.I agree that the merits of technological arts surpass the demerits
To begin
 with, inter-networking around the globe has become faster and easier.Individuals around the world can communicate even when they travel.
otherwise
Capitalize word
Otherwise
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, they will write a letter and send it to them through the post which takes about a month for individuals to receive it in the absence of the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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. Most people do business online and chat with their partners through the internet.
In addition
, technological modules have created many apps through which people can learn in the comfort of their homes and get certificates online.
Similarly
, during the
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
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 pandemic, education sessions were held online which was very beneficial
to complete
Change preposition
for completing
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 courses.
For example
, I studied care management online affiliated with Florence
academy
Capitalize word
Academy
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 in the UK without necessarily travelling.
However
, there can be instances where there will be network disconnections in which communication can be interrupted.
For instance
, when a corporate organization involving people in different countries decides to hold a meeting online and unsudden
happened
Wrong verb form
happens
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 that the network fails the meeting will be unsuccessful.
Also
, it causes distraction.Some students might overlook the benefits of using the internet for research and rather watch unnecessary videos which will not help In conclusion,inter-networking around the continent is faster and easier.
Conversely
, the network might be disconnected in some instances.But I am of the view that social media has brought many changes which have affected the world positively.
Submitted by yahayasonde2 on

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task response
Your essay demonstrates a basic understanding of the topic, but you need to expand on your points and provide more detailed examples to fully address the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but the introduction and conclusion need further development to fully address the prompt. Additionally, you should use clearer transition words and expressions to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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