IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph illustrates

The graph illustrates
The graph illustrates
amount
Add an article
the amount
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 of energy usage by fuel in the US from 1980 to 2030. It can readily apparent that Petrol and Oil was the most consumed energy by the citizen of
US
Correct article usage
the US
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, followed by Coal and Natural Gas.
Conversely
Linking Words
, Nuclear, Solar/Wind and Hydropower were the least energy to use. By 1980, Petrol and Oil
was
Change the verb form
were
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 combusted around 35 quadrillion units,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
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it's
Unnecessary verb
it
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 fluctuated in the next 15 years, and continued by increased exponentially until reached
peak
Correct article usage
a peak
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by
Change preposition
of
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 roughly 48 in 2030. The same pattern happened
on
Change preposition
in
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 Coal and Natural Gas,
although
Linking Words
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 value was about half
than
Correct word choice
that
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Petrol
Change preposition
of Petrol
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 and Oil. Natural Gas stopped the trend in 2015 and remain stable by 25 in the
last
Linking Words
 15 years of monitoring. Meanwhile, coal continue to grow until it scored 30 in 2030. Nuclear, Solar/Wind and Hydropower began with the same number which was 4 in the initial period
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and fluctuated steadily in 50 years of
survey
Add an article
the survey
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, which comes with 6, 5 and 4 respectively in the final year.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • bilingual
  • multilingual
  • fluency
  • communicate
  • cognitive skills
  • cultural awareness
  • opportunities
  • globalized world
  • job market
  • interact
  • linguistic abilities
  • cultural exchange
  • language proficiency
  • language barrier
  • foreign travel
  • personal growth
  • academic achievement
  • self-confidence
  • enhance
  • cross-cultural communication
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