Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
These days, alternative medicines are becoming prevalent among people
instead
of modern treatments by doctors. From my point of view, while
this
growing trend can have minor advantages, it might lead to detrimental consequences. In this
essay, I will explore the compelling reasons for my perspective.
First of all, it is stated that alternative treatments are not reliable because they are not knowledge-based, while
new remedial methods are due to
numerous investigations. For example
, it was written in a magazine that a certain pill will be allowed to be taken by patients after more than 10000 tests in various conditions which often can take 50 years. Also
, some of the remedies
like traditional ones are not sometimes effective in this
era. For instance
, some people were reluctant to be vaccinated against epidemic Corona and they instead
used homemade medicine which unfortunately resulted in increased mortality rates
Furthermore
, some remedies
like utilizing herbal medicines are rudimental and are not appropriate in emergency situations. For example
, although
eating some fruits that contain vitamin A can improve eyesight, it can respond as fast as eye surgery. Besides
, it is noteworthy that alternative remedies
will not be supported by insurance. Therefore
, if individuals encounter some dangerous issues of incorrect treatments, they might be imposed by intensive financial burden.
In conclusion, some people nowadays tend to experience different remedies
instead
of usual ones like meeting doctors. However
, I am of the opinion that it is a negative trend due to
a lack of reliability, late effectiveness, and being uncovered by insurance. So, this
idea is not only unsuitable but also
can lead to devastating results.Submitted by TUTOO on
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language
Consider diversifying your vocabulary to avoid repetition and enhance readability. For instance, using synonyms for 'remedies' or 'treatments' can improve the essay's lexical resource.
structure
It would be beneficial to provide clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to seamlessly guide the reader through your main points.
detail
Though the examples are relevant, aim to elaborate more on how they specifically support the main argument. This will add depth to your essay and demonstrate analytical skills.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that nicely frame the discussion. This is crucial for achieving coherence and cohesion.
detail
The points made in the essay are generally clear and well-supported with relevant examples. This demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.
logic
Your arguments are logical and well-reasoned, showing a good command of task response and coherence.