Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development

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These days, alternative medicines are becoming prevalent among people

instead

Linking Words

of modern treatments by doctors. From my point of view,

while

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this

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growing trend can have minor advantages, it might lead to detrimental consequences. In

this

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essay, I will explore the compelling reasons for my perspective. First of all, it is stated that alternative treatments are not reliable because they are not knowledge-based,

while

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new remedial methods are

due to

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numerous investigations.

For example

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, it was written in a magazine that a certain pill will be allowed to be taken by patients after more than 10000 tests in various conditions which often can take 50 years.

Also

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, some of the

remedies

Use synonyms

like traditional ones are not sometimes effective in

this

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era.

For instance

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, some people were reluctant to be vaccinated against epidemic Corona and they

instead

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used homemade medicine which unfortunately resulted in increased mortality rates

Furthermore

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, some

remedies

Use synonyms

like utilizing herbal medicines are rudimental and are not appropriate in emergency situations.

For example

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although

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eating some fruits that contain vitamin A can improve eyesight, it can respond as fast as eye surgery.

Besides

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, it is noteworthy that alternative

remedies

Use synonyms

will not be supported by insurance.

Therefore

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, if individuals encounter some dangerous issues of incorrect treatments, they might be imposed by intensive financial burden. In conclusion, some people nowadays tend to experience different

remedies

Use synonyms

instead

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of usual ones like meeting doctors.

However

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, I am of the opinion that it is a negative trend

due to

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a lack of reliability, late effectiveness, and being uncovered by insurance. So,

this

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idea is not only unsuitable but

also

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can lead to devastating results.

Submitted by TUTOO on Mon Feb 06 2023

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language

Consider diversifying your vocabulary to avoid repetition and enhance readability. For instance, using synonyms for 'remedies' or 'treatments' can improve the essay's lexical resource.

structure

It would be beneficial to provide clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to seamlessly guide the reader through your main points.

detail

Though the examples are relevant, aim to elaborate more on how they specifically support the main argument. This will add depth to your essay and demonstrate analytical skills.

structure

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that nicely frame the discussion. This is crucial for achieving coherence and cohesion.

detail

The points made in the essay are generally clear and well-supported with relevant examples. This demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.

logic

Your arguments are logical and well-reasoned, showing a good command of task response and coherence.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
treatments
positive development
negative development
health problems
usual doctor
access
personalized approach
holistic well-being
lack of regulation
evidence-based research
proper medical treatment

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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Animals are always better off the wild. Do you agree or disagree?

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative situation?

More and more people are forgetting the actual meaning of occasions (e.g. national festivals). What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions do you suggest?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. DO the advanatges of this outweigh the disadvantages?