IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many contries, shopping onlines is replacing shopping at stores. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages

#contries #onlines #stores
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority of nations prefer online buying rather than shopping offline. E-commerce is convenient and
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
. But there are drawbacks to be considered. On the
one
Use synonyms
 hand, there are obvious benefits to online shopping.
One
Use synonyms
 plus point is that we can purchase the items within less
time
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
. if we want to buy a dress
then
Linking Words
 we have to select the item which is needed
then
Linking Words
 by sitting at home, there will be no stress or tension of traffic astime-savingg.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
one
Use synonyms
 more reason for shopping online is that it is more convenient.
For example
Linking Words
, we get a chance to look at various items, if we want to buy a shoe with variant brands
then
Linking Words
 they did not need to go to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
various
storess
Correct your spelling
stores
storeys
Ii
Correct your spelling
I
show examples
 can order every brand of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shoe by sitting in
one
Use synonyms
 place.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
one
Use synonyms
 problem is that we receive damaged items sometimes
due to
Linking Words
 which we have to wait for replacement and it takes more
time
Use synonyms
 rather than buying directly from the store. Another possible issue is that online shopping takes
time
Use synonyms
 to receive the products.
for example
Linking Words
 in case of buying any item for the wedding which is needed instantly
then
Linking Words
 we have to go directly to the store because online it takes delivery
time
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 online shopping brings us benefits
such
Linking Words
 as convenience easy, it can
also
Linking Words
 affect product quality.
Submitted by Amtul on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: