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Band 4

Nowadays there are more and more advertisements. Some people think that they have a negative influence on people, and therefore should be restricted. Do you agree or disagree?

#advertisements #people #influence
It is true to say
advertise
Wrong verb form
advertising
show examples
 become more popular currently
from
Change preposition
than
show examples
 before. Few masses believe that they have
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
 impact on
people
 and for that
reason
Add a comma
,reason
show examples
 it should be cramped in my opinion there should be no restriction on commercials because they
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
 only
source
Correct article usage
a source
show examples
 of information but
also
effectiveness
Add an article
the effectiveness
show examples
 of the
product
To begin
with
Add a comma
,with
show examples
 first crucial reason to support my
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
 is that advertisement provide a lot of information about the characteristic of the
product
 which
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 the buyer to pick the
product
according to
 their need
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
elaborate consumer can know the price ingredients functions
as well as
 offer available on the
product
Add the comma(s)
, for example,
show examples
for example
 the Indian brand Patanjali advertise a lot of
product
Replace the word
production
show examples
 of food and Cosmetic which helps Patanjali to Grab the market of India and there consequences a lot of Indian use wide range of Patanjali products
moreover
 proper information about the
product
 and offer available on it protect the consumer being cheated by sellers
On the other
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 the reason why
people
 think that
advertise
Wrong verb form
advertising
show examples
 should be restricted
firstly
 because the attractive way of advertisement
attract
Correct subject-verb agreement
attracts
show examples
 the buyer to buy
product
Add an article
a product
the product
show examples
 which has no use for them
Add the comma(s)
, for example,
show examples
for example
 a practical shown in the University of London where
people
 send to Shopping Mart during
offer
Add an article
the offer
show examples
 and it was observed that most of the
people
 purchase
product
Add an article
a product
the product
show examples
 which they not need. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 it is true that some
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
 have
Add an article
a disadvantage
show examples
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
 but their
positive
Fix the agreement mistake
positives
show examples
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
far more
Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
 the negative
Submitted by anksah2000 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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